Summary of key features of my cycles

I plan to merge the short list below and the following longer list, and also plan to condense the writing of this page somewhat, at a later date.

Here are some key features to my cycles:

a naked sun stare/thorn hill climb/blue rose vision two days before new moon, in early Sept., 1991 at age 27.5. This became unmanageable since it was before I was on lithium.
three more waning crescent highs each preceded 5.5 lunar months before by a waxing gibbous moon trial, and one more high without such a precursor, all in 1993--1994 (plus a waxing gibbous moon trial in May 1992 that was extended past full moon by marijuana use, which I now avoid, plus I avoid alcohol during waxing moon but not waning moon and that has prevented severe waxing gibbous moon problems from mid-July 1997 on).
two early waxing moon trials in early Jan., early Apr., 1995, not as bad as the waxing gibbous moon ones of 1992 to 1994 though.
mystic "live" sparks as opposed to dead normal static ones
low years beginning in late January 1996 and not over yet but which I postulate lasted 7 years for past figures but longer for me since I have had access to medication and also lifespans are longer on average these days. During the first two years this involved a fairly constant low level of delusion, paranoia, magical conspiracy theories, and isolationism with stronger flare-ups during Jan96, May96, Jun96 and Jul97 waxing gibbous moons. This mostly subsided when my lithium was increased back to a level of 0.8 in July 1997 and I also again gave up drinking during waxing moon. But I continued to believe base chakra area muscle click divination and that led to the mildly delusional eyebrow matchmaking theory (but no paranoia), and after I gave up on that in early May 1999 (based on negative evidence and lack of evidence) I resolved to no longer believe base chakra area muscle click divination (but from late March 2003 to Feb. 10, 2005 I broke that resolution). Then in March 2003 I came off olanzapine and may have experienced mild withdrawal symptoms but those have improved, and the reason for the olanzapine, which was the insomnia with invisible pokes of late 1998, has not returned. However I don't believe I am fully out of the low years yet, but may graduate as a nature-trained opener of the way when I am out. The celtic section and buddhist section of the parallels subpage have a bit more on seven years stuff and I have some more related native and shamanic links which are in the links section.
each high had an M class solar flare a few days before onset plus I had a depression in 1986 during the low of the sunspot cycle and my low years began in early 1996 not long before the low of the sunspot cycle, and hence I postulated an 11 year cycle in my mood, but I now think this is not the case. But if it was it would be like the 11 year solar sunspot amplitude cycle, which also matches the seven score muses (which I think are lunar months, and there are 136 lunar months in 11 years) mentioned by Taliesin in one of his poems. (I now think this was due to his having seven years of low years; if I had seven years of low years it would put me at eleven years and five lunar months, or seven score lunar months, past my sun stare). But I won't know for sure for a few decades if I have a sunspot cycle variation in mood. The sunspot cycle peaked in 2000 but the spots then were smaller than those which should be around in early 2003 so the peak spot surface area might be in early 2003 and peak flare activity might be in early 2003. In any case my 1991 high was two or three years after a sunspot cycle peak so if I have an eleven year cycle my next high could be in 2003. Actually the sunspot cycle can range from 10 to 12 years, so that the next waning crescent high (manageable on lithium) could occur as late as September 2003, 12 years after my first high, nine years after my last high, and well over seven years after my low years started. (It did not occur.) But if it occurs much later than that that would be evidence against my sunspot cycle variation theory though I won't know for sure for a few decades. However I am reasonably happy with the lunar phase correlation component of my theory (and my related practice of not drinking during waxing moon). The September 2003 waning crescent high did not occur, and the last sunspot cycle was closer to 11.2 years than 12 years but for now I won't modify my theories, and hope for a waning crescent high in October, but if I don't have one in the next year I will then believe that my waning crescent highs were just part of my early initiation by my deities including the sun and do not recur. (September, 2006: I have not had a sixth waning crescent high yet and do not think I am out of the low years yet though my mental health is fairly steady these days, but I am not creative.)

Taliesin (Gwion Bach) had 2, 4 and 5 and some evidence of 1, or an experience like it, and some evidence of 3 (if the crack of the cauldron is new moon) and for my other parallels I have evidence so far only for some of the above, for example Krishna was described as the butter thief, which I take to mean waning crescent highs, and fought with demons, which I take to mean waxing gibbous moon (poison-nippled demon) trial periods.

OK, now, from an e-mail to an online acquaintance (edited a bit since) here is a longer list of 45 features that overlaps some with the above list:

academic star including in religion as a child and teen (but I have not studied religion formally since the world religions course in the final year of my Catholic Roncalli high school, in Avondale, educaton) and since in science (but I am not a carpenter [or engineer]). I am not a religious studies specialist and have done no academic courses in religious studies since my last year of high school, and my best subject is mathematics. I have been in school and university a total of 28 years so far, primarily focused on science since high school.
inspired, including musically, by a devi type (Sarah McLachlan, singer/songwriter, former head of Lilith Fair, of Vancouver, Canada). Devi and avatar are Hindu terms but I am not Hindu so I add the word type, and I as avatar type do not want to be worshipped and probably Sarah as devi type does not want to be worshipped. Devi is a female term and deva is a male term which is confusing since in English diva is a female term. The similar devi type for Krishna as avatar type was Radha. But they were involved, and though Sarah is my main musical inspirer she is currently married to someone else, and by all accounts happily married, so I have allowed my romantic thoughts to stray to other women more easily than if I had any chance with her. I hope for UN-negotiated terms for devi type and avatar type. These days I am using the term avatar-2 for avatar type and another term, avatar-1 (which I have also called current avatar) for one exhibiting certain soul (I define soul by saying I can sense something that I call soul, but I also think that soul is the part of a probably higher dimesnional someone, which I think we humans are, outside of the matter and energy part, and I am not saying that matter and energy are not higher dimensional) duality and ideally soul alignment with a big-souled someone, but IN THIS PAGE if I use the term avatar (not Avatar or current avatar) by itself (not preceded by current) I mean the inner circle of Hinduism Hindu definition of avatar. Obviously I say avatar type and not avatar since I am not Hindu. I have removed my definitions of avatar-1 and avatar-2 from this Salmon on the Thorns web page but may put them back on at a later date.
shaktipat (proximity induced kundalini awakening) from a holy figure, in my case Gioia Irwin, in Jesus's case perhaps John the Baptist
clear sky lightning inspiration (related to seraphim; also coincidentally Harry Potter has a lightning scar and is an orphan like me but is much younger and has glasses like me though on my web page pictures I have contacts on or have taken my glasses off as I did before my sun stare); also one case of extremely variable weather including extremely high winds on one day inspiration (related to cherubim)
very bad eyesight, now -11 diopters in my left eye and -10 diopters in my right eye, plus astigmatism
born premature during a storm but put in an incubator rather than into a box containing wool or hay. I am a seventh surviving child, but the eight pregnancy of which one was of two fraternal twins and one was a miscarriage and another was a set of fraternal twins who died shortly after birth.
waning crescent inspiration
sun stare tunneling to higher dimensions and wrapping of wings of space around me which I think augmented my form in higher dimensions; followed by effective baptism in the ocean
naked thorn hill climb just as painful (multiple piercing and hanging on thorns on steep hill and consider that most pain sensors are in the outer part of the flesh, ultra painful thick acupuncture awakening and earth connectivity ordeal) as crucifixion and with thorns like those in the Catholic picture Sacred Heart of Jesus (very similar, and the ones in the Passion movie, from an ad, are too far apart, you could get your finger between them and avoid being pierced, though they are longer and sharper than the ones I climbed up over)
glowing sky blue rose vision at night amidst thorns
waxing gibbous moon trials with release by full moon
5.5 lunar months (eight score days, six solar rotations) separation from waxing gibbous moon trial onset to waning crescent high onset (so my max such separation was 164 days, one less than the long Catholic rosary)
stigmata spots at the beginning of 1995
mystic "live" sparks as opposed to dead normal static ones
two "dove"/World Aids Day ribbon/lily of the valley/dancing sky vagina visions
what I think was samadhi (merging with something sublime, or it at least made me feel sublime, and then snapping back into myself), however I need to research the term some more so for now just call it "samadhi" (in quotes). The merging occurred as a sensation of me slipping upwards partly outside of my body and merging with the something sublime. Then after a time I snapped back into my body. I was standing the entire time. By me slipping upwards I mean it felt as though my consciousness (or focus of consciousness) was slipping up and out of my body. Perhaps that meant my soul or spirit was slipping upwards, depending on how you define soul or spirit. I define soul as something I can sense and which I call soul and I think the soul of a human is the part of the human outside the matter and energy part, where I think a human is higher dimensional, but I am not saying that matter and energy are not higher dimensional. Also despite the use of the word sublime (I could also have used the word exquisite or the word blissful) I have never worshipped the something sublime unless it was among my deities for some other reason, i.e., some other description of it. And now (July 2005) I have no deities (I am an atheist) so I definitely do not worship it. Again the experience of merging was a sublime experience but not to the point of worship of the someone I merged with. I never consciously made any decision to worship the something sublime and indeed consciously made a decision not to worship it. My labelling the something I merged with sublime does not constitute worship of it. I have no deities.
skullcap pressure sensation, at The Edge bar, which is now closed (I have details for all these in my earlier writing but not necessarily on my web page yet, but many are in the long Mystic bio section of this web page already)
"buddha" belly circles (one smaller, one larger, not at same time, smaller one lasted much longer)
invisible turban winding/unwinding sensations
sensible (but not solid, sensible by chi hand warming and tingling in the region) invisible sphere a ways above my head varying in height and diameter for a while (this may or may not be relevant, and some of these may be out of chronological order, I will have to check my old computer and paper files later)
invisible head circlet with thorn/spark sensation at the centre, so a crown of thorn I guess, but at the top of the head not around the third eye level.
invisible forehead tendrils and invisible bum pokes causing insomnia (this may or may not be relevant) beginning in Fall 1998 and lasting a few months but going away when I started olanzapine so if I had not that may have lasted longer (but I am now off olanzapine and they have not resumed).
have learned to drink only during waning moon and not during waxing moon by unfortunately having 8 strong mixed/psychotic waxing gibbous moon trials from 1992 to 1997 that were alcohol (or once marijuana) triggered or greatly worsened. Since July 1997 I have often drunk a lot during waning moon but this has not triggered such reality distortion/world gone sour symptoms or worsened my state when I was already having problems and in fact I have often posted more lucidly after drinking recently. On Monday and (or?) Wednesday May 10 and 12, 2004 at Erin's Pub I got a bit drunk and loud at one point but that is to be expected with alcohol sometimes, and I was very fine the next day. So two pints in March 1994 waxing gibbous moon got me in trouble, and 6--11 pints from July 1997 to now during waning moon has not. However after Monday/Wednesday I will follow my psychiatrist's advice and limit myself to at most four pints in at least four hours even during waning moon.
much supposed base chakra area muscle click divination and such click (short period mulabhanda) as closure (it is a silent click, or muscle jerk, not an audible click). Now sometimes this muscle action can be quite strong so that my whole body moves a bit as a result, and as a result when I am sitting down it may cause my legs (more often my left leg it seems, but maybe that is because I am slouching with my weight on one side a bit and haven't been doing any yoga asanas lately at all) to apparently jerk, but really it is not a leg muscle movement but the base chakra area muscle movement causing the leg to move slightly as a secondary effect.
involuntarily celibate, except for masturbation, from spring 1986 to now; had four poor sexual experiences with four women in 1984 and 1986, have speculated that I am compatible only with bisexual women and those four women were not bisexual. In any case given my low level of attraction to those women I should not have tried to proceed, and if I proceeded I should have spent longer getting to know the women and longer in foreplay. Regardless of that, there are some women that I am attracted to at a distance much more than other women, and I have speculated that they are bisexual (are attracted regularly and significantly to both genders) but I have little evidence for that yet so I have to assume that they might not be bisexual. The early marriages of the Buddha, Amergin and Mohammed may have been similarly incompatible, and I do not know at what ages Krishna and Radha were when they married). I have also theorized that I am most attracted to bisexual women who have had a large number of orgasms for their age, including some recently, and am not much attracted to bisexual women who have had no orgasms. If my four orientation theory is incorrect then you can remove the word bisexual in the last sentence.
Have I had any attraction to men? Very little, and generally accompanied by third eye distortion such that when I brush off or pat my third eye the attraction disappears (or I can look over my glasses and there is a buzz sensation and the attraction disappears). My attractions have been almost entirely to women and my strongest attractions have been to women and any slight attraction to men (perhaps labelled a test by Mara by the Buddha) is not enough to label me bisexual instead of straight.
7--8 years of low/wilderness/ascetic/foresaken/cremation ground years (well, I am now [Sept. 5, 2006] over five weeks past 10.5 years but hopefully should gain some acceptance at age 42, which I am now) which began on Jan. 29, 1996, just before I turned 32, and were worst at ages 32 and 33. I postulate that I have had low years longer than the seven years of some past figures since lifespans are longer today on average and since I have had access to modern medications which have made the low years easier for me.
not a cult leader type, I do not want followers (of me or anyone) but want people to think for themselves but that can include recognizing good stuff and echoing it within themselves but not always blindly following everything by the same person. For example I might recognize that some of Stephen Hawking's mathematical physics is correct within current error bars but that does not make me a follower of Stephen Hawking, i.e. I would check the math in each of his statements, but he would have cracked open the light, or been the teacher, so to speak, in instances where I do verify his statements.
have experienced various uplifting coincidences including signs from other species, funny number coincidences, and stumbling sometimes by random page choice on very significant information in books.
significant messages for someones as far as I know of and can communicate with, in this case at least the human species on this planet and in near space, and of those some new component, not just the same old same old since then there would be no need for a Messenger/focus of rapid (on historical time scales) change. My attempted workings to bring about positive change have extended far beyond this planet and this species though.
significant breakthrough(s) in lore -- for me one such breakthrough is my showing that some past pagan and non-pagan major religious figures including Jesus were similar to one another and were similar to me, and I will continue to gather backing evidence for that. Another such breakthrough if it is true would be my four orientation theory (that there is a fourth orientation compatible only with bisexuals of the other gender) and I hope to research whether it is true or not, and if not if at least the statement that compatible relationships result in longer lifespans than incompatible relationships is true. Aside from that I have brainstormed numerous scientific and entrepreneurial ideas (along with some word play physics clues) since and including 1991 and will compile a file of such soon plus I hope to continue to come up with new ones. And also I have come up with some personal mystical working theories which I will continue to develop and also relate to science. Also I have through checking solar cycle data shown that the initial waning crescent high and subsequent waning crescent highs come during high to medium years of the 11 year solar cycle and that most if not all of the highs are preceded two or three days before by an M class solar flare. Also I theorize that the clear sky lightning at the onset of some of the highs is a result of interaction of said solar flare with the ionosphere. So I have developed a fair bit of lore so far and will continue to build on that.
is oppressed and/or ridiculed and/or disbelieved and/or ignored and/or labelled a lunatic some before being accepted (so in my case I think including by a little censorship including a few non-justified third-party cancels of my newsgroup posts and apparently stronger censorship a while ago but that may be due to coincidental newsserver problems on two newsservers) but sometimes a bit for good reason since there may be last minute breakthroughs in the drunken weave Home.
Have tried healing of quite a few others and it remains to be determined whether that has had any effect beyond my own subjective perception of having brought some people out of mild depression. Since this is not much dependent on base chakra area muscle click except for closure sometimes I trust it a bit more than my matchmaking and related blind following of the click divination.
Have TRIED to pass on my higher dimensional connections and healing and some other abilities to many others, including those I call loveagents who are those, in my theory, picked by LOVE2 for their goodness but who do not have to worship LOVE2. (Note that I am now an atheist and no longer worship LOVE2 myself.) Such would be in I bet all religious paths and atheism and agnosticism and humanism. But as I said above I do not want followers but want people to think for themselves and I am not starting a new religion, there are plenty, but am a global glue figure and it could be that individual loveagents within individual religious paths may become or remain more prominent than me in those paths, plus past founder type figures in those paths would I bet remain more important than me in those paths but I am the global balancing Opener of the Way figure for all humans on this planet and in near space including atheists (atheists can look at it as feedback from the system[s] through me if it works, I guess).
can do musical boosting of musicians on stage and venue "charging", subjectively to my ears and my feeling within the venue, including sensing of the air, but this remains to be confirmed objectively by others
at several stages I have had what I call twiddles, like slight sensations at various points on my body, I sometimes call them question mark hooks, which then need to be cleared. Sometimes they can be cleared by a simple base chakra area muscle click. More often lately (though they have slacked off now, which is good since they are annoying) I have to clear them by visualizing myself as a subset of all/everything and puffing out my consciousness a bit (so loose focus and puffing out) and ending in base chakra area muscle click closure. Sometimes though I am seemingly posed a mathematical problem and have to visualize the solution to get closure. (These have faded a great deal as of May 13, 2004.)
for I think a couple of years now (I'll dig out the date later) I have experienced what I call shakti buzzes (internal river rushes of fire, not much if any actually auditory) which began when they occurred when I was fantasizing about kissing a woman (not always on the lips). This later was extended to supposed formation of shakti asociation between woman and one of my deities by my also thinking of said deity just before and during the imagined kiss (almost invariably lips) and buzz. Now while I have not much researched the Hindu term shakti, one tantric site (will insert URL later) said that it is the bridge between the human and the divine, and I saw that long after I started using the term. Also in Hinduism some women are said to be incarnations of Shakti I think but that is not the same as say the shakti association between Sarah McLachlan and Gaia in my personal mystical working theory formulation.
I do not have significant voices in my head, none of my messages including extinction reel are derived from voices in my head. However when I strain to get through to someone remotely I sometimes get low level almost subliminal but I think fake voices back at times, and likewise if I have been up very late streaming/babbling ideas (I guess some meditation would me from overdoing that) I also get such very low level voices at times but they do not have significant content and I consider them fake/spurious and anyway do not get them very much, so my psychiatrist considers me bipolar type I instead of schizoaffective. However it could be that past figures similar to me without medication may have had slightly more of that but I still do not think they would have gotten significant messages that way, and no doubt laboured over time to come up with their messages after some inspiration and a fair bit of trial and error and constraining, and perhaps some in the way described on extinction reel. And my psychiatrist has told me even completely normal people can get such low level occasional spurious voices at times if they strain.
I am by nature a night person though I can get up early but do only if I have to, and the only times I posted between 4 a.m. and 11 a.m. when I was at UBC were when I was up all night, on at least almost invariably if not always. Between late 1996 and fall 2002 I only had Internet access mostly on Saturday afternoons/early evenings, not nights. From Sept., 2002 to recently I had access at the office too but rarely was in as late as when I was at UBC but rarely posted before noon. Recently I have had nighttime dialup access from home most nights a week and have been posting late again, plus sometimes apparently early when I have not gone to bed yet, and apparently early when I wake up in the middle of the night to pee and have an idea I want to post. But generally I function best after noon and if I had a job with early hours would do routine stuff in the morning and more creative/intellectually demanding stuff in afternoon and later. But if I was married and had early baby duties I might be able to force myself to get up, I suppose.
I had four bad right knee injuries from summer 1978 to early 1981 (plus a slight wrench in fall 1985) that might have left me lame were it not for modern medicine.
in summer 1982 at the age of 18 I had my appendix out (the pain started in one incident in math class earlier and there were two later incidents, so it was a brewing appendix, and on the third I had it out, but since all the tests for appendix proved inconclusive and there was no hardness on the right side of my tummy and there was pain on both sides on my tummy they cut me up the middle but it did turn out to be my appendix). The pain of the incidents and after the operation was great, as was a strange rash I had the year before, but both were less intense in pain than my naked thorn hill climb.
In recent months (actually maybe on and off as long as two years though maybe less, but it has picked up in the last week) I have done a lot of hair twirling though my hair is relatively short so I do not have dreadlocks. But it reminds me of the hair of an African figure (doll/bust) I saw in a shop window once, not just of dreadlocks.
I am into word play though the risk of that is that it can be misinterpreted when I leave it vague/unexplained to test/challenge the reader. I did more of that at UBC on the FTE mailing list.
I have a huge number of muses (influences) including many singer/songwriters and other musicians and some poets and other writers and some scientists and some activists and certainly many past religious figures though I need to read more into such, I have dabbled a bit at reading their bio notes but not as much at reading their messages (except for Jesus more since I was educated as a Catholic, though I am now ex-Catholic but still Jesus influenced) and poetry (except a bit of Taliesin and Turquoise Bee and some of Mohammed's stuff is poetry) so far. My own poetry/lyrics so far is not very good yet but I think it will improve soon, and also there are a few I haven't put on my web page yet.
Five years before my 1991 sun stare, in 1986, the year I had a long term low level depression, there was a gathering of a global scale (of people from around the world celebrating culture and science and more), Expo 86, in Vancouver. Vancouver, where I was from Sept. 1, 1985 to Dec. 14, 1995, is 4504 miles (more than 7000 km, so more than the radius of the earth even to the outer atmosphere I think, which is how the planet Earth is defined by modern geoscientists including me, and planetologists, space scientists, and astronomers, and for sure quite a bit greater than the radius of the solid+liquid part, which when some say "the radius of the Earth" they are referring to, which is sloppy when they define the Earth as I do [as including the atmosphere] of the planet, which is about 6400 km) from St. John's, Newfoundland where I am now (and I grew up in Newfoundland) and have been (or very nearby) since Dec. 15, 1995. My longest distance (in terms of separation between me and the woman or women I was fantasizing about) and best orgasm was the night before new moon on Jan. 29, 1995, when I was in Vancouver and the two women I was fantasizing about (with self touch) were in New Zealand. For a while I thought this occurred in early December, 1994 but my e-mail files point to Jan. 29, 1995. Sarah McLachlan was one of those two women and has toured to many places on the globe and visited some others (e.g. Cambodia and India) that she has not yet played concert gigs at, as far as I know. Also my writing has gone out not just on this World Wide Web web page (which I think many more have accessed directly or by relay to them, including some translation, than the counter indicates) but also on e-mail mailing lists, web forums, and in over 10,000 posts since and including 1991 to Usenet newsgroups distributed worldwide on the Internet, and many of those posts went to more than one group (were crossposts). Also I have shaken hands of people from many countries and many religions when playing badminton, and have heard live musicians from many countries, including Babatunde Olatunji when he was alive (I heard him at the Kitsilano Neighbourhood House folk festival in Vancouver).
Since the fall of 2003 I have had no trouble drinking from bottles or with a straw but in drinking from beer cans or water glasses or pint glasses or beer mugs I have had some trouble with my tongue not lying flat and not retracting and it takes more effort than it should to drink without spilling some over my shirt. I do not know if that is significant but it is an unusual change. My psychiatrist suspects that it may be due to tardive dyskinesia brought on by haloperidol use on occasion starting in 1991. Thus I am now avoiding haloperidol, if I need extra meds I will take extra olanzapine. If this drinking problem does not improve, my psychiatrist may refer me to a neurologist.

Also there may be other significant points that I fail to list above that may be in my old paper and newsgroup, e-mail, e-mail mailing list, web forum and web page old drafts or partial drafts, and current web page writing which I will sort through and extract from later.

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