In early April, 1995, just at/after new moon (not 3 days after like January) I had a wobbly April Fool's weekend, not nearly as bad as the early January bad dreams. But I stayed home and did some odd playful things such as:
This was all just playful/eccentric/wobbly and I was not too stressed and may not even have taken any haloperidol. But if I had been at the office I would have taken a small amount.
Aug/Sep94 was my last pre-new-moon in-control high of the last solar cycle; and this Apr95 was the last post-new-moon incident until the insomnia of Feb.8,9/97. This coincides with the low of the solar activity cycle.
Early in the spring of 1995 I was invited by my friend Ariane Behrend (who knows Sarah McLachlan) to be her guest (on a guest list double pass) at a concert by Shane MacGowan and The Popes with my friends The Paperboys opening, at The Commodore Ballroom in Vancouver. At the end of the night I was standing on some steps, facing away from the stage. Suddenly a woman came up behind me, palmed my right elbow with a moist, hot, electric hand and pulled slightly to the left and ran off to the right so that I looked left and when I looked right she was halfway to the door. At the time I didn't know who it was but I have since become convinced it was Sarah McLachlan, especially after the events of May 13 described below. (Her hair colour and hair length and height were right.) But why would she fall for me? I think some of my creative writing on the Fumbling Towards Ecstasy mailing list somehow got to her and struck a chord with her.
On May 13, 1995 I went to The Treehouse, the bar in the basement of the St. Regis Hotel diagonally opposite from The Railway Club in Vancouver, for a Music West showcase. I had been invited by my friend Danielle French (who did a CD backed by some members of Sarah Mclachlan's band), who was playing the showcase in a duo with my friend Jenny Allen. They played early and then left to catch Ani diFranco at another venue. Then Kathryn Rose did a set and I was very impressed and followed her with my eyes after the set until suddenly I spotted Sarah McLachlan talking to her. A little later I went to the washroom and when I came back Sarah McLachlan was near the bar and suddenly stared at me as if to drink me up, as if I was her long lost lover, as if she was the fan and I was the star. But stupidly I didn't speak to her right away and instead went to the bar where a woman came between us and where Sarah ordered a Swan and had to settle for a Sharp's (or the other way around, they are .5% beers) and I ordered a rye and water because the next day was Mother's Day and I thought that my mother might have sipped on rye and water on occasion. At the time I wasn't thinking of Sarah's then rye whiskey coloured hair or her song IWRY (I Will Remember You). But I planned to speak to her before the night was out, though I felt shy about approaching her in her group of friends. Then Holly McNarland got up and did a song with a line about dying in water, which got me emotional since my mother was washing me (when I was 1.5 years old) when she died in front of me, and again it was Mother's Day (and full moon). So I wimped out and didn't speak to Sarah and went across the street to The Railway Club to hear Colin Hay (of Men at Work) when I should have asked Sarah if she wanted to hear him.
Then a few weeks later I went to The Railway Club to hear Jay Knutson with Holly McNarland opening and Sarah was there with a guy and I was jealous and we both ignored one another, when I should have said hi and apologized for not speaking to her at The Treehouse after that soul-fixing stare. But later on her Surfacing album she had a song called I Love You which I think references that stare.
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