Key features of my cycles

Here are some key features of my cycles:

1. a naked sun stare/thorn hill climb/blue rose vision two days before new moon, in early Sept., 1991 at age 27.5. In the sun stare there was a tunneling (like a curved divine horn of oil with its wide mouth towards me) beyond the sun, I think into higher dimensions, followed by a descent of giant "butterfly wings" on me, which I think may have augmented my form in higher dimensions. I liken this experience to Jesus's baptism when the heavens opened and wings descended on him. And I liken the glowing blue rose amidst the thorns to the burning that did not consume in the thorn bush of Moses.
2. three more waning crescent highs each preceded 5.5 lunar months before by onset of a waxing gibbous moon trial, and one more high without such a precursor, all in 1993--1994 (plus another waxing gibbous moon trial in May 1992 that began a day or two before full moon and was extended slightly past full moon by marijuana use, which I now avoid during waxing moon, plus I avoid alcohol 1--9 days before full moon and that has prevented severe waxing gibbous moon problems after mid-July 1997).
3. two early waxing moon trials in early Jan., early Apr., 1995, not as bad as the waxing gibbous moon ones of 1992 to 1994 though. These early waxing moon trials were like a waning crescent high turning sour after new moon but without the waning crescent high.
4. mystic "live" sparks as opposed to dead normal static ones
5. low/wilderness/ascetic/foresaken/cremation ground years beginning in late January 1996 and not over yet but which I postulate lasted 7 years for past figures but longer for me since I have had access to medication and also lifespans are longer on average these days. During the first two years this involved a fairly constant low level of delusion, paranoia, magical conspiracy theories, and isolationism with stronger flare-ups during Jan96, May96, Jun96 and Jul97 waxing gibbous moons. This mostly subsided when my lithium was increased back to a level of 0.8 in July 1997 and I also again gave up drinking 1--9 days before full moon. But I continued to believe perineum area muscle click divination and that led to the mildly delusional eyebrow matchmaking theory (but no paranoia), and after I gave up on that in early May 1999 (based on negative evidence and lack of evidence) I resolved to no longer believe perineum area muscle click divination (but I still play at it some). The celtic section and buddhist section of the parallels subpage have a bit more on seven years stuff and I have some more related native and shamanic links which are in the links section.
6. each high had an M class solar flare a few days before onset plus I had a depression in 1986 during the low of the sunspot cycle and my low years began in early 1996 not long before the low of the sunspot cycle, and hence I postulated an 11 year cycle in my mood, but I now think this is not the case. Apr. 5, 2020: I am still not out of the low years after over 24 years, and it could be that I will have to wait until 33 [11+11+11] years after my first high, so September 2024, or 29 [7+11+11] years after the low years started, so late January 2025. But I hope the low years will end sooner.
7. academic star including in religion as a child and teen (but I have not studied religion formally since the world religions course in the final year of my Catholic Roncalli high school, in Avondale, educaton) and since in science (but I am not a carpenter [or engineer]). I am not a religious studies specialist and have done no academic courses in religious studies since my last year of high school, and my best subject is mathematics. I was in school and university a total of 31 years, primarily focused on science since high school, and was granted a Ph.D. in geophysics in May, 2018.
8. inspired, mainly by her music, by a mi-ootw type (Sarah McLachlan, singer/songwriter, head of Lilith Fair, of Vancouver, Canada). The similar mi-ootw for Krishna as ootw was Radha. But they were involved, and though Sarah is my main musical inspirer she is far away and not involved with me, so I have allowed my romantic thoughts to stray to other women more easily than if I had any chance with her.
9. spontaneous shaktipat (proximity induced kundalini awakening) from a holy figure, in my case Iyengar yoga teacher Gioia Irwin, in Jesus's case perhaps John the Baptist
10. clear sky lightning inspiration (related to seraphim; also coincidentally Harry Potter has a lightning scar and is an orphan like me but is much younger and has glasses like me though on my web page pictures I may have contacts on or have taken my glasses off as I did before my sun stare); also one case of extremely variable weather including extremely high winds on one day inspiration (related to cherubim)
11. very bad eyesight, now -11 diopters in my left eye and -10 diopters in my right eye, plus astigmatism
12. born premature during a storm but put in an incubator rather than into a box containing wool or hay. I am a seventh surviving child, but the eight pregnancy of which one was of two fraternal twins and one was a miscarriage and another was a set of fraternal twins who died shortly after birth.
13. stigmata spots at the beginning of 1995
14. A merging with something sublime, or it at least made me feel sublime, and then snapping back into myself (for a while I called this samadhi but I think samadhi is usually attained by meditation). The merging occurred as a sensation of me slipping upwards partly outside of my body and merging with the something sublime. Then after a short time I snapped back into my body. I was standing the entire time.
15. skullcap pressure sensation, at The Edge bar, which is now closed
16. "buddha" belly circles (one smaller, one larger, not at same time, smaller one lasted much longer)
17. invisible turban winding/unwinding sensations
18. sensible (but not solid, sensible by chi hand warming and tingling in the region) invisible sphere a ways above my head varying in height and diameter for a while
19. invisible head circlet with thorn/spark sensation at the centre, so a crown of thorn I guess, but at the top of the head not around the third eye level.
20. invisible forehead tendrils and invisible bum pokes causing insomnia beginning in Fall 1998 and lasting a few months but going away when I started olanzapine so if I had not that may have lasted longer
21. have learned to not drink 1.0 to 9.0 days before the exact time of full moon, by unfortunately having 8 strong mixed/psychotic waxing gibbous moon trials from 1992 to 1997 that were alcohol (or once marijuana) triggered or greatly worsened. Since July 1997 I have often drunk a good amount during waning moon but this has not triggered such reality distortion/world gone sour symptoms or worsened my state when I was already having problems and in fact I have sometimes posted more lucidly after drinking. 2020: I now usually limit myself to 3 pints twice a week/
22. much supposed perineum (the region between but not including the anus and the genitals) area muscle click divination and such click (short period mula bandha) as closure (it is a silent click, or muscle jerk, not an audible click). The click is a alight contraction of the perineum area muscles combined simultaneously with a moving together of my upper thigh muscles. I think the perineum area is the base chakra but others say the base chakra is at the base of the tailbone, or sacrum area.
23. involuntarily celibate, except for masturbation, from spring 1986 to now; had four poor sexual experiences with four women in 1984 and 1986, have speculated that I am fourth orientation, compatible only with bisexual by nature women and those four women were not bisexual by nature. And I do know or know of some bisexual women who I am attracted to, who might be like the cowherd women associated with Krishna, where the cow is associated with full moon. I have also theorized, based on an observed "blossoming" of one woman, that I am most attracted to bisexual by nature (who can be bisexual, lesbian, straight or celibate by lifestyle) women who have had a fair number of orgasms for their age, including some recently, and am not much attracted to bisexual by nature women who have had no orgasms.
24. not a cult leader type, I do not want followers (of me or anyone) but want people to think for themselves but that can include recognizing good stuff and echoing it within themselves but not always blindly following everything by the same person. For example I might recognize that some of Stephen Hawking's mathematical physics is correct within current error bars but that does not make me a follower of Stephen Hawking, i.e. I would check the math in each of his statements, but he would have cracked open the light, or been the teacher, so to speak, in instances where I do verify his statements. Also I have resolved to not found a new religion.
25. have experienced various uplifting coincidences including signs from other species, funny number (especially 55, which is LV in Roman numerals) coincidences, and stumbling sometimes by random page choice (e.g. thumbing) on very significant information in books.
26. significant messages, which are from me, for my people (humans globally), and of those some new component, not just the same old same old since then there would be no need for a Messenger/focus of rapid (on historical time scales) change. I do not know which of my messages are agreed with by each of my deities but suspect that I wouldn't be allowed to proceed unless there was some agreement.
27. significant breakthrough(s) in lore -- for me one such breakthrough is my showing that some past pagan and non-pagan major religious figures including Jesus were similar to one another and were similar to me, and I will continue to gather backing evidence for that. Another such breakthrough if it is true would be my four orientation theory (that there is a fourth orientation compatible only with bisexual[s] by nature of the other gender) and I hope to research whether it is true or not, and if not if at least the statement that compatible relationships result in longer lifespans than incompatible relationships is true, such that e.g. lesbians who voluntarily marry men may have a black widow effect. Aside from that I have brainstormed numerous scientific and entrepreneurial ideas (along with some word play physics clues) since and including 1991. And also I have come up with some personal mystical working theories which I will continue to develop and perhaps relate to science. Also I have through checking solar cycle data shown that the initial waning crescent high and subsequent waning crescent highs come during high to medium years of the 11 year solar cycle and that most if not all of the highs are preceded two or three days before by an M class solar flare. Also I theorize that the clear sky lightning at the onset of some of the highs is a result of interaction of said solar flare with the ionosphere.
28. is oppressed and/or ridiculed and/or disbelieved and/or ignored and/or labelled a lunatic some before being accepted but sometimes a bit for good reason since there may be last minute breakthroughs in the drunken weave Home.
29. Have tried healing of quite a few others and it remains to be determined whether that has had any effect beyond my own subjective perception of having brought some people out of mild depression. Since this is not much dependent on the perineum area muscle click except for closure sometimes I trust it a bit more than my matchmaking (before the March 8--20, 2019 period when I think I finally had an accurate matchmaking siddhi) and related blind following of the click divination. 2012: I have had little luck doing healing yet, except perhaps some effect on mental illness including depression. 2020: I also now think I can do soul fragment retrieval to help treat trauma-related disorders including PTSD.
30. Have TRIED to pass on my higher dimensional connections and matchmaking (which I think I had from late March 8 to early March 20, 2019 and from April 9 to July 2, 2021) and some other abilities to many others through what I call assisted shaktipat.
31. I think I can do musical boosting of musicians on stage and venue "charging", subjectively to my ears and my feeling within the venue, including sensing of the air, but this remains to be confirmed objectively by others
32. at several stages I have had what I call twiddles, like slight sensations at various points on my body, I sometimes call them question mark hooks, which then need to be cleared. Sometimes they can be cleared by a simple base chakra area muscle click. More often lately (though they have slacked off now, which is good since they are annoying) I have to clear them by visualizing myself as a subset of all/everything and puffing out my consciousness a bit (so loose focus and puffing out) and ending in perineum area muscle click closure and often a kundalini buzz. Sometimes though I am seemingly posed a mathematical problem and have to visualize the solution to get closure. (These have faded a great deal as of May 13, 2004, and have been gone since I went back on olanzapine in early 2005.)
33. for a number of years now (I'll dig out the date later) I have experienced what I call kundalini buzzes or shakti buzzes (internal river rushes of fire, not much if any actually auditory) which began when they occurred when I was fantasizing about kissing a woman (not always on the lips). This later was extended to supposed formation of shakti asociation between woman and one of my deities by my also thinking of said deity just before and during the imagined kiss (almost invariably lips) and buzz. Now while I have not much researched the Hindu term shakti, one tantric site (will insert URL later) said that it is the bridge between the human and the divine, and I saw that long after I started using the term. Also in Hinduism some women are said to be incarnations of Shakti I think but that is not the same as say the shakti association between Sarah McLachlan and Gaia in my personal mystical working theory formulation. (But none of my eight main deities are anthropomorphic or gendered.)
34. I do not have significant voices in my head, none of my messages including extinction reel are derived from voices in my head (or from perineum click divination). However when I strain to get through to someone remotely I sometimes get low level almost subliminal but I think fake voices back at times, and likewise if I have been up very late streaming/babbling ideas (I guess some meditation would prevent me from overdoing that) I also get such very low level voices at times but they do not have significant content and I consider them fake/spurious and anyway do not get them very much, so my past psychiatrist considers me bipolar type I instead of schizoaffective. However it could be that past figures similar to me without medication may have had slightly more of that but I still do not think they would have gotten significant messages that way, and no doubt laboured over time to come up with their messages after some inspiration and a fair bit of trial and error and constraining, and perhaps some in the way described on extinction reel. And my past psychiatrist has told me even completely normal people can get such low level occasional spurious voices at times if they strain. 2012/2013: not much of such low level internal voices lately. 2020: no such "pillow talk" low level voices for a long time now.
35. I am by nature a night person though I can get up early but do only if I have to. 2012: I now have high speed Internet, and often post late but haven't been doing any all-nighters. 2020: I still stay of late but am getting enough sleep.
36. I had four bad right knee injuries from summer 1978 to early 1981 (plus a slight wrench in fall 1985) that might have left me lame were it not for modern medicine.
37. in summer 1982 at the age of 18 I had my appendix out (the pain started in one incident in math class earlier and there were two later incidents, so it was a brewing appendix, and on the third I had it out, but since all the tests for appendix proved inconclusive and there was no hardness on the right side of my tummy and there was pain on both sides on my tummy they cut me up the middle but it did turn out to be my appendix). The pain of the incidents and after the operation was great, as was a strange rash I had the year before, but both were less intense in pain than my naked thorn hill climb.
38. years ago (actually maybe on and off as long as two years though maybe less, but it has picked up in the last week) I have done a lot of hair twirling though my hair is relatively short so I do not have dreadlocks. But it reminds me of the hair of an African figure (doll/bust) I saw in a shop window once, not just of dreadlocks. 2012: none of that in years, and little pacing and checking.
39. I am into word play though the risk of that is that it can be misinterpreted when I leave it vague/unexplained to test/challenge the reader. I did more of that at UBC on the FTE mailing list in 1994 and 1995.
40. I have a huge number of muses (influences) including many singer/songwriters and other musicians and some poets and other writers and some scientists and some activists and certainly many past religious figures though I need to read more into such, I have dabbled a bit at reading their bio notes but not as much at reading their messages (except for Jesus more since I was educated as a Catholic, though I am now ex-Catholic but still Jesus influenced) and poetry (except a bit of Taliesin and Turquoise Bee and some of Mohammed's stuff is poetry, though I now doubt that Mohammed was an ootw since he is said to have had significant voices) so far.
41. Five years before my 1991 sun stare, in 1986, the year I had a long term low level depression, there was a gathering of a global scale (of people from around the world celebrating culture and science and more), Expo 86, in Vancouver. Vancouver, where I was from Sept. 1, 1985 to Dec. 14, 1995, is 4504 miles (7200 km, so more than the radius of the earth even to the outer atmosphere I think) from St. John's, Newfoundland where I am now (and I grew up in Newfoundland). My longest distance (in terms of separation between me and the woman or women I was fantasizing about) and best orgasm was the night before new moon on Jan. 29, 1995, when I was in Vancouver and the two women I was fantasizing about (with self touch) were in New Zealand. For a while I thought this occurred in early December, 1994 but my e-mail files point to Jan. 29, 1995. Sarah McLachlan was one of those two women and has toured to many places on the globe and visited some others (e.g. Cambodia and India) that she has not yet played concert gigs at, as far as I know. Also my writing has gone out not just on this World Wide Web web page but also on e-mail mailing lists, web forums, and in over 10,000 posts since and including 1991 to Usenet newsgroups distributed worldwide on the Internet, and many of those posts went to more than one group (were crossposts). Also I have shaken hands of people from many countries and many religions when playing badminton, and have heard live musicians from many countries, including Babatunde Olatunji when he was alive (I heard him at the Kitsilano Neighbourhood House folk festival in Vancouver).
42. Since the fall of 2003 I have had no trouble drinking from bottles or with a straw but in drinking from beer cans or water glasses or pint glasses or beer mugs I have had some trouble with my tongue not lying flat and not retracting and it takes more effort than it should to drink without spilling some over my shirt. I do not know if that is significant but it is an unusual change. My past psychiatrist suspects that it may be due to tardive dyskinesia brought on by haloperidol use on occasion starting in 1991. Thus I am now avoiding haloperidol, if I need extra meds I will take extra olanzapine. If this drinking problem does not improve, my psychiatrist may refer me to a neurologist. (He did and the neurologist found nothing plus I was unable to do the behaviour while with the neurologist.) It is a problem of jaw and lips and tongue and has since extended some to eating as well as drinking. I think is is a tardive oromandibular dystonia but my past psychiatrist isn't sure about that. 2020: It is now less of a problem.
43. Years ago I occasionally had the experience of someone else looking through my eyes. Then I would raise my glasses to show them that I have bad eyesight and they would go away. At no time did they try to control me. I call those entities glasses someones.
44. One night I think in 1997 when I was out for a walk there was a nearly invisible inverted cone with its point on the top of my head and its axis tilted a bit to the vertical and precessing about that vertical. In the cone I saw some nearly invisible flying beings. I thought at the time that the cone extended to the stars. I call those flying beings cone someones.
45. For over a year I had a null orgasm (normal erection and normal ejaculation but no orgasm). That was not solved by my coming off olanzapine briefly. It eventually came back on its own, even while I was on both lithium and olanzapine. I'll insert the dates of it later.
46. dragon lines unraveling around my arms and back in early 1996
47. spark from my sister Anne's left eye to my right eye, in early 1996
48. In early June 1996 I was paranoid of some family members, but not as much of my sister Anne, but thought her a bit under their sway. As she was going out one day I got her to remove my glasses and look me in the eye, hoping to break the supposed spell. But as I did so, her eyes merged into one eye, like the eye of Isis (or Horus?), at the third eye chakra; as if to say "don't mess with me, I have protection."
49. At one folk festival I think in the late 90s I could see coloured auras around people (different colours for different people).
50. My mother died in front of me when I was about 1.5 years old, and that is similar to the Buddha's mother dying when he was very young, which is supposed to be true of all buddhas. So perhaps my mother, who was a devout Catholic, has been a guardian angel of sorts to me.
51. Beginning in September 2004 I have had four periods of what I call centred clarity, including good mood (but within normal range). The first three lasted only about fifteen minutes each, and the fourth lasted over a day. I think that these were temporary periods pf awakening/enlightenment. I didn't note the dates and lunar phases of any except the first one, which was just before new (dark) moon.
52. I have a brother who has also experienced mental health problems and who is an extreme morning person while I am an extreme night person.
53. My eldest sister (and eldest sibling) is a well-known poet.
54. After my parents died I was raised mainly by my (next eldest) sister Anne, who has been like a mother to me and was a virgin for the first while, with some help from aunts and uncles and nuns early on.
55. It is now June 29, 2022. For the past 26 years I have done much perineum click (short period mula bandha) negotiation (again I don't have voices), often late at night, addressing various deities, most recently Goddess (the ruler of the region all/everything, who many call God), in an attempt to instigate a global golden new age. As part of that I attempted a global binding of criminals and a global species balance but those have been rejected. However my funnel, assisted shaktipat (including granting of funnelling, soul alignment, and matchmaking abilities to many), and evolution (including of current adults) workings have supposedly been accepted. There is a bit more detail on those on Recent Changes.

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